


Everywhere You Look

by The_SS_Koizumi



Category: DRAMAtical Murder - All Media Types, Full House
Genre: Asphyxiation, BDSM, Crossover, I'm Going to Hell, I'm so sorry, Implied Mpreg, M/M, Rape, Smut, This will ruin your childhood, sin - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-16
Updated: 2016-02-16
Packaged: 2018-05-21 04:10:20
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,908
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6037530
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_SS_Koizumi/pseuds/The_SS_Koizumi
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Aoba's a single mom with three beautiful girls. Though life isn't always easy, with the help of loving uncles Trip and Virus, along with their many friends, their wacky lives are filled with love and happiness. Truly a heartwarming piece of fiction for the entire family.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Everywhere You Look

**Author's Note:**

  * For [SassyStrider](https://archiveofourown.org/users/SassyStrider/gifts).



> Get ready to have your beloved family sitcom defiled!

Everywhere You Look

"Aoba-San! Hurry up! You'll be late!" Virus shouted from the kitchen. 

Aoba jumped at the sound of yelling, picking up the pace at which he was getting ready for work in his bedroom. "I'll be down in a second!" He pulled those disgusting piss-yellow socks onto his feet, and rushed out of the bedroom. 

"Your children just left for school without saying goodbye to you, Aoba-San." Trip smiled at him as Aoba stumbled down the wooden stairs. "If there was a school shooting today, they would have died without even being able to say goodbye to their mother."

(Audience laughter)

Aoba stopped and stared at the mentally ill blonde, eye slightly twitching. "Thanks, Trip. I needed something else to keep me awake at night."

(Audience laughter)

The man smiled innocently. "No problem."

Virus rolled his eyes at his partner's antics. "Seriously, Aoba. You'll be late for work. Let's go."

Aoba grabbed the lunch Trip had thoughtfully prepared for him, and followed Virus out of the door.

\---

(Full House theme song plays)

\---

Haga-San looked at his watch. "You have thirty seconds to get on set or we'll start without you." 

Aoba nodded frantically and hurried onto the set, just barely sliding into one of the leather seats before the show started. 

"Waaaaake up!" The music played as the sign behind the chairs which read "Wake Up Midorijima!" Lit up. 

Aoba smiled at his co-host, Mink, who just looked really pissed off at the him. He always gave off the vibe that he really disliked Aoba, but then again, he looked at everyone like that. Aoba had a theory that it was just the way his face was. 

"Sorry," he mouthed, but Mink just shook his head disapprovingly. He was not willing to take Aoba's shit today. 

Aoba ignored his co-hosts mild hatred and smiled at the camera, trying his best to look pretty. That was all he was paid to do, anyways. Mink did most of the talking. He was just there to up the ratings and make jokes and stuff. Obviously his job was very fulfilling. 

They reported meaningless crap for a good hour and a half, until the show ended. 

Aoba was about to go meet Virus offstage, but Mink stared at him intensely and jerked his head towards the back of the set. Because apparently this is the only thing anyone has to do to make Aoba go somewhere with them (no matter who they are) Aoba followed obediently. 

When they were out of the view of wandering eyes, Mink leaned towards Aoba. "You know, you really piss me off."

Aoba felt his face get hot. "Oh...uh...sorry?" He stuttered, not really sure how he was supposed to respond to that. 

(Audience laughter)

Mink rolled his eyes. "I bet you think you can just be late every single day because and no one will care because you're pretty, don't you?"

"W-well. No?"

Mink stepped closer to Aoba, who was now a stuttering mess. "You know the last time I was late to work was because I had to drive my ninety six year old granny to her dialysis treatment, and my pay was docked."

"That's terrible!"

"Yeah. I don't know why Haga-San lets you off the hook so often, but just so you know, you're not off the hook with me. Someone should probably punish you." Mink kept getting closer and closer to a terrified Aoba until his back hit the wall. 

A smirk contorted Mink's face, and he grabbed Aoba, and slammed him against the wall. He pressed his lips firmly against the blue-haired twink's and shoved his tongue roughly into his mouth. 

Aoba struggled to get out from underneath him. He could feel the adrenaline pulsing through his veins, and the only thing he could think about was getting away from this horrible man. In a moment of panic, he brought his knee up into Mink's bulge with all of his strength. 

Mink released his hands momentarily, and separated their lips. He grunted in pain at his dick being smashed, but he still didn't give Aoba any room to squirm away.

"Hey asshole! I am a strong, independent Asian woman...or am I a man? It's complicated. But anyways, you can't touch me like that!" Aoba glared at the larger man defiantly. 

Mink laughed cruelly. "Oh really? If you're so independent, then why do you have your crazy yandere boyfriends chaperoning you all the time? It's sad, really."

(Audience laughter)

Aoba's face burned bright red. "Well!...My 'crazy yandere boyfriends' are going to kick your ass, because they'd do anything for me!"

"Aoba, you slut!" Virus's voice could be heard from behind Mink. "What do you think you're doing? Seducing other men! You belong to me and Trip, remember? Do you want to go back in the box? Hmmm?" 

(Audience laughter) 

Mink gave a harsh laugh and let Aoba go. The ashamed man slunk away to stand next to Virus, murmuring an almost inaudible, "no."

Mink smirked triumphantly at the defeated Aoba. "He'd do anything, you say?"

\---

Aoba didn't even bother struggling against the bonds Trip and Virus had used to immobilize his arms and legs. This had happened hundreds of times before, and whenever he tried to free himself, it had just gotten him into more trouble. He was sure Virus was going to put him in the box again, even though the blindfold kept him from seeing where blonde Satan was taking him. He felt his bare leg hit cold metal, and a shiver ran down his spine. While he had been tied up hundreds of times before, he had only been put in the box once, and it was the second most terrifying thing he had experienced in his life, right after sex with Trip's allmate and the father of his three children, Welter. "N-no! P-please!" Aoba cried out desperately, trying to see if he could tap into any sliver of humanity that this soulless monster might possess. 

Virus stopped forcing Aoba into the box, and placed a finger to his chin thoughtfully, fully processing the plea. "Hmmm. What shall I do? You did cheat on us. Trip is so distraught at your unfaithfulness. But is this going a bit far? Hmmm."

\---

Trip was sitting on the couch in the living room, reading a magazine, when Aoba's three human-robot lion hybrid children burst through the door, extremely excited to see their beloved Uncle Trip. 

Before I continue, let me explain what exactly these lion babies are. They walk on two legs, but their feet and hands looked like human hands, but they had pads on them, and claws. They had bright blue manes, and large golden eyes, like their mother. They had human faces, too but with razor sharp teeth, and whiskers. So, yeah. They're pretty much furries.

DJ, Stephanie, and Michelle crowded around Trip and gave him many painful hugs, digging their claws deep into his back. He pushed them away, because being punctured was no fun, and DJ asked, "Uncle Trip, where's Uncle Virus and Mommy?"

Trip stooped down to the children, knowing exactly what to say. "Mommy isn't feeling well, so he'll have to rest for a couple of days, and Uncle Virus is taking care of him right now."

Stephanie looked at her Uncle with sad golden eyes. "Can we visit mommy?"

Trip shook his head sadly. "No. Sorry, children. Your mommy is very contagious. We need to keep you away from him."

Virus came down the stairs, looking rather pleased with himself. "Hey kids! How was school?" 

"Good!" They chorused. 

"I want mommy!" Michelle roared. 

Trip rolled his eyes. "I don't see why you're so obsessed with that guy."

(Audience laughter)

"Well, he's our, you know? Mommy?" The lion child looked at the man like he was stupid. "I WANT MOMMY GIVE ME MOMMY!" She screeched. 

Trip and Virus covered their ears to try to block out the horrible noise. Trip looked to his partner, trying his best not to haul off and slap Aoba's kids, because Virus told him he couldn't touch the kids, and he did pretty much everything Virus said. 

Virus had a brilliant idea to get those stupid brats to shut up. Making a mental note to punish Aoba for making such shitty kids, he crouched down in front of the screaming lion children. "Would you like to hear the story of how you were conceived?" 

The girls nodded, not really knowing what conceived means. "Yeah!"

\---

"And we didn't know it at the time, but when your daddy's sixteen inch lion dick split open your mommy's asshole, your mommy somehow ended up with a lovely little DJ. For the rest of you, pretty much the same thing happened, except that gradually, your mommy struggled less and less, because he had lost the will to fight back. The end." Virus finished the story, and stood up from the couch they were sitting on. 

"Yaaay!" The children cheered after the story. 

(Audience laughter)

"Wait. What happened to daddy?" DJ asked her uncles. 

Virus sighed. "I'll give you the shortened version of this. So, your daddy was also having the sex with my all mate, Hersha. Hersha got a little too curious while slithering up your daddy's asshole, and bit one of the wires inside of him. They were both electrocuted to death." Virus wiped a tear from his eye and smiled. "I really liked that snake, you know. It felt good to watch your mommy jerk off to it." 

(Audience laughter) 

The three sisters looked at each other in horror. "This makes me want mommy even more!" Michelle cried out. "MOMMYYYYYYY!" 

Virus covered his ears and looked over to Trip, his eye twitching a little. "Go get fucking Aoba!" He barked. "He's in the box! Go!"

Trip hurried up the stairs, "but Aoba cheated on us!" 

"I don't fucking care. We'll find some other way to punish him. I actually can't handle his children any longer!" 

\---

Aoba had been in the box for several hours when his children's heart wrenching cries for their mother hit his ears. There was no way that Trip and Virus were going to let him out of the metal box from hell so easily this time. They had convinced themselves that Aoba had been cheating on them, which wasn't the case at all. If they had just given him the time to explain...

A few more minutes passed before his daughter began crying again, and he could hear Trip and Virus shouting, as well. He let out a sob. He had no idea what they might be doing to his babies. His maternal instincts kicked in, and he began banging on the sides of the box and shouting. He didn't have much room to struggle, but he was able to press his body weight on one side, just enough so that the box tipped over and fell to the side. The loud clanging of the box shook him to the core, and his head throbbed. He grit his teeth, and tried to get the box on a different side. He succeeded, and felt another shattering jolt. He cried out in pain, but he was still extremely determined. 'Don't worry kids.' He thought. 'here I come.'

\---

Trip rushed up the stairs per Virus's orders, and into the hallway. He grabbed the doorknob, and swung open the door. 

To his shock, the box was sitting right in front of the bedroom door, nowhere near the bathroom. 

Trip could hear faint grunting coming from the box. "Ghh. Aghhh. Naah." The box tipped over, and the side tipped over with a clang. "Ow." Aoba continued doing this, desperately trying to inch the box closer to the door, to rescue his children from inside of the box. "Ghh. Aghhh. Naah." The box tipped over again, approaching Trip. "Ow." 

Trip placed his foot on top of the box, and held it down, keeping Aoba from getting any further. He could feel the man inside push himself against the walls desperately. "Ghhhhhh. Aggghhhhhhh. Naaaaaahhh." The grunting stopped. 

"Aoba. What the hellz?" Trip asked. 

(Audience laughter)

"Oh shit. I've been caught." Aoba's voice was muffled by the metal confinements. Be tried pushing against the side opposite to Trip, with no avail. 

"Are you actually trying to get away? You're I a two by two steel cube how the hell did you even get this far?" Trip laughed at the silly man. 

(Audience laughter)

"I'm trying to save my children." Aoba grunted, still trying to push the box away. 

"In a box?" 

"Mmhmm."

"That's stupid."

"You're not a mother. You wouldn't understand."

"You do know you are completely at our mercy, right? Even if you did get down there, we could just sit on the box and shut down your entire mission." He chuckled. "This is really funny."

Aoba could feel tears prickle his eyes, and was glad that Trip couldn't see his face. 

"Well, today's your lucky day. Your kids won't stop screaming and we need you to make them shut up." Trip opened the box and helped Aoba out. 

(Audience laughter)

He could hardly stand from being curled up in a ball for so long, and stumbled into Trip's arms. "Haha. If you insist, I'm sure we can play a little before you go downstairs." Trip said, grabbing Aoba by the waist. 

"Oh my god Trip make it stop!" Virus's voice could be heard from downstairs, and Trip sighed, grabbing some clothes from the dresser. "Fine! We'll be down in a second!" 

With the help of Trip, Aoba clumsily got dressed, as the feeling in his legs started to come back. He stumbled down the stairs with Trip supporting him, and smiled when he saw his screeching children unscathed. 

"MOMMY!" Michelle shouted, and ran to Aoba, tackling him in a hug. Her claws dug into his back painfully, and he could feel tears come to his eyes. 

"Hey, sweetie, how was school?" He asked, trying to hide the pain in his voice. 

"Good." The girl giggled. "How was work?"

"Good." Aoba laughed, and gave his daughter an Eskimo kiss. 

"Vomit." Virus said in disgust. "Go make dinner, Aoba."

(Audience laughter)

\---

"This is disgusting, Aoba!" Trip glared at the cowering man. "I told you to make dinner, not vomit!"

(Audience laughter)

"I'm sorry." Aoba tried not to have a panic attack. He whispered. "Please don't yell in front of the kids!"

"I do what I want!" Trip was actually getting flustered. Aoba had not yet tried the thing he had made for dinner, but could it really be that bad? 

Aoba rolled his eyes. "Don't get angry, it can't be that horrible." He took a bite of the thing and gagged. It really was that horrible. "Please forgive me." He whispered. 

DJ shrugged. "So what if mom's a shitty cook-"

"No swearing." Aoba warned. 

"I do what I want!" The girl mimicked her uncle. 

(Audience laughter)

Trip smiled. "I've got a mini-me!" 

Aoba shuddered. "Oh god, no."

DJ ignored her mother's suffering. "Anyways, I was about to say, maybe we can just order a pizza."

Virus shrugged. "It's better than whatever this is." 

\---

About an hour later, Trip, Virus, Aoba, and the girls were sitting in their living room, bored as heck. They had played seven games of Uno waiting for the pizza guy, which made Aoba absolutely sure that he was in hell. 

Suddenly, the door bell rang, and Aoba rushed to answer it. 

Some hipster carrying a pizza box stood at the door. His luscious blonde hair and insane amount of piercings almost made Aoba swoon. "Hot...damn." The blue-haired homosexual whispered under his breath. 

"Yo." The guy pushed Aoba aside, and sat down on couch in the living room. 

"WTH?" Trip asked, too cool to speak like a normal person. What are you doing, why are you on our couch?" 

The man whose name tag read "Noiz" opened up the pizza box, and looked up at a panicking Trip. "I'm going to eat this pizza in your house."

(Audience laughter)

"Why?" Virus asked. 

The girls ignored the intruding pizza man, took the other pizza, and chanted "P-I-Z-Z-A! Give me pizza!" In slow motion. They headed into the kitchen, and left the adults alone. 

Noiz shrugged. "I feel like eating your pizza, that's why. I'm already half an hour late, I can't make it any worse."

"THIS is worse!" Trip shouted, losing it a little. "Get out of our house, and stop eating our-oh my god, wtf?"

Noiz had rolled up the pizza while Trip was freaking out, and had started deep-throating it. 

Aoba screamed. "What? Doesn't that hurt?" 

Noiz shook his head, and shoved the pizza in further. 

Aoba flinched, but this was also turning him the heck on. He suddenly found himself wishing that that pizza was his dick. Without thinking, he mumbled. "Devour me, Noiz."

Virus glared at him. "I heard that."

(Audience laughter)

Aoba blushed, not sure what to do. 

Noiz shoved the pizza in further. And further. And fucking further. 

Trip and Virus were cowering from the monster behind Aoba. 

Aoba looked at his captors in shock. "You're yakuza! Do something!"

"We never actually do things, Aoba. You should know that."Virus hissed. 

(Audience laughter)

They watched the man swallow the entire pizza, and then fall asleep on their couch. 

The three stared at him, unsure of what to do. 

"Do we just...leave him?" Aoba asked. 

Virus nodded. "Yeah...um...let's...do that."

\---

"Alrighty Aoba-San. Virus said I could play with you tonight, so let's have some fun!" Trip approached a trembling Aoba. "What's wrong? You don't seem thrilled." He grabbed a knife from the dresser and used the tip to turn up the corner of Aoba's mouth. "Smiiiiillle." He laughed whimsically when a bead of blood trickled from Aoba's lips. 

Aoba whimpered, knowing that he was only being teased before Trip made him feel unimaginable pain. He smiled widely on his own, hoping that it would make Trip stop. 

"Yaaay!" Trip cheered. "I knew you had it in you. I'm bored. Let's move on to something else." Trip thought for a moment. "Oh! I read something fun in this one fan fiction. Yeah, I want to do that!" He walked into the bathroom, and Aoba could hear the bathtub start to fill up with water. His chest started to feel tight. Was he going to drown him or something? 

Trip left the sink running and returned to Aoba, smiling. Yeah, he was definitely going to drown him. The blonde never smiled that widely unless he was going to do something that compromised Aoba's safety. He pulled out the knife again. "I was thinking while we waited for your 'bath' to be ready, we could play with knives!"

Aoba shuddered, and tried to back away from him, but Trip grabbed him by the hair. Aoba gasped in pain, hating the way he was so vulnerable with just one tug. 

"Not so faaast." Trip sang. "We haven't even started yet." He pulled the knife across Aoba's arm lightly, and a small scratch appeared on the flesh. It looked like a mere papercut, but it still bled, and Aoba could feel it stinging painfully. The mark was barely visible, so Virus would never know. 

Trip cut him again and again and again, until Aoba felt like he couldn't handle the pain anymore. 

Unfortunately, this wasn't even the worst thing that Trip had in store for him. 

Aoba heard some of the water tricking onto the floor, and Trip smiled at him fiendishly. "Your bath is ready, my beloved Aoba-San."

Aoba didn't even bother trying to struggle anymore. Every time he tried to fight back against the stronger males and lost, it just made him feel even more pathetic. What was the point?

Trip dragged him to the side of the bathtub, and Aoba looked down at his own reflection in the water. He looked like a frightened child, completely helpless at the hands of someone much stronger than him. Trip's face appeared in the water next to him. "Ready Aoba-San?" 

Aoba felt like he was about to throw up. He didn't answer his captor, but Trip didn't seem to really care if Aoba was ready, anyways. Trip grabbed the blue-haired twink by the hair on the back of his head, and shoved his head forcefully underneath the water. Aoba panicked, and tried to struggle against Trip. This only made the sick man laugh. "Aoba-San, you look so funny flailing around like that." Trip pulled out his already-hard member, and smiled. "Here comes the fun part." 

Without even thinking to prepare Aoba, he thrust violently into his asshole, and the unfortunate victim jerked in pain, screaming under the water. Trip wasn't in any way little, and the sensation of his dick tearing into Aoba's anus made him see stars. When the smaller man opened his mouth to scream, water rushed in, and created somewhat of a vacuum. Aoba was actually drowning as that disgusting man was fucking him. 

Trip thrust in and out, and each time slamming mercilessly into Aoba's hips. 

'Am I going to die?' Aoba thought. 'What about DJ and Stephanie and the other one who's name I can't think of right now?' 

(Audience laughter)

He struggled underneath Trip, and he felt him release inside of him, the man juices feeling wonderfully disgusting inside of him. Aoba's lungs burned, and tears were leaking from his eyes, mixing with the bath water. His vision began to fade, and he was absolutely sure that this was the end. We wasn't sure how he felt about that. He loved his daughters, even the little one, whose name he sometimes forgot, but it would be nice to not have to go through this ever again. 

Suddenly, Trip let go, and Aoba pushed his head up to the surface, gasping for sweet, sweet air, and retching the water from his lungs. 

"Aoba asked me to do it! This was consensual!" Trip cried. 

Their neighbor, Clear stood at the doorway, covering his eyes. "I-I'm so sorry! I had no idea!" He tried to shield himself from the nudity. 

"Aoba wanted this!" Trip stated defensively, as Aoba retched and sobbed next to the tub. 

"I know! I know! I-I'm sorry! I heard master's voice, and I got scared for him!" The robot cried, he tried to run away, but because he had his eyes covered, he just ran into the wall, and sprawled out onto the floor. 

(Audience laughter)

Trip rolled his eyes. "Whatever. I'm done, anyways." He stood up, pulling on his pants, and left Aoba and Clear alone in the bathroom. 

"Master!" Clear cried, and rushed to his master's side. 

Aoba buried his face into his friend's shoulder, and sobbed. 

Clear rubbed his back soothingly. He let him go just for a moment to grab a towel from the linen closet, and draped it around Aoba's shoulders. "What was going on, Master?" 

Aoba shook his head, still traumatized by the rough way he was handled. "H-he..." But that was all he was able to choke out before he broke into a fresh round of sobs. 

Clear shushed the distraught man, and Aoba smiled sadly at his only friend. 

Aoba and Clear had known each other ever since Virus and Trip moved him here. He was extremely supportive, and Aoba always told him pretty much everything. The rest of the family thought the robot was weird, mostly because of the way he always called Aoba "master,"and that strange gas mask he wore, and his general awkwardness. (All of which Aoba figured was a byproduct of the bizarre way Clear's grandfather raised him). 

Clear held Aoba on the bathroom floor until Aoba calmed down, and the robot released him. "Are you okay now, master?" 

Aoba nodded. "Yeah. I think so." He said shakily. 

They hugged one more time, and then Clear went home. Aoba got ready for bed. 

Trip was already in the large bed, and Aoba prayed he had fallen asleep, and was not waiting for round two. He silently slipped into bed, and breathed a sigh of relief when the other man didn't stir. 

'This is my life.' He thought miserably. 

\---

"DJ?" Stephanie asked her sister. "Why do you think mommy's been acting so sad lately?" 

DJ shrugged, concentrating on the piece of leftover pizza she was eating for breakfast. "I dunno. I didn't even notice he was sad. I mean, doesn't he always act like that?" 

Stephanie picked at her pizza. "Well, yeah, but I don't think it's normal to be sad all of the time."

"It is for mom."

"How rude of you to say that! Well I want to make him happy!" 

DJ sighed. "Well, you know how mom always has to do all the cleaning around here? Why don't we do it for her?" 

"I thought Uncle Virus said that mommy liked cleaning."

"Nobody likes cleaning, Steph." 

(Audience laughter)

"Oh. Then that sounds like a great idea!" 

"What sounds like a great idea?" The pizza guy walked into the kitchen, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes. 

The sisters looked at each other in shock. 

"We can start by getting this weirdo out of here." DJ smirked at Noiz, a perfect imitation of her Uncle Virus. She unsheathed her claws, and lunged at Noiz. "Raaawr!"

(Audience laughter)

The pizza guy looked at her in mild terror. "Oh shit!"

\---

When Aoba and Virus came back from Aoba's job, they were greeted by three over zealous lion children. 

"Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey mom, guess what?" DJ asked excitedly. 

"What is it sweetie?" He asked, kind of afraid to know what his daughter was so excited about. 

"We cleaned while you were gone, so you don't have to!" 

Aoba smiled at his sweet daughters. "That's really nice of you guys. Thank you!"

Stephanie placed her hands on her hips, and scolded. "You know, you shouldn't eat so much cake in Uncle Trip's bedroom! There were crumbs everywhere! There was even some frosting or glaze or something right next to the bathtub!" 

Aoba looked to the ground, embarrassed. "Yeah. Frosting..."

(Audience laughter)

"You're going to attract ants! You know..." The bitchy daughter continued nagging Aoba, but he tuned her out when he remembered that Koujaku was supposed to call today. His heart fluttered just thinking about his wonderful voice. 

"Mom! Are you even listening?" 

"Yes, sweetie, I am." Aoba could hear the phone ringing. "Why don't you kids go play outside. I'll get the phone." He dashed almost suspiciously to the kitchen where the phone was, and picked it up. "Hello?"

"Hey, baby." Koujaku's voice could be heard on the line. 

Aoba smiled to himself. "Hey. How's it going?" 

"So-so, I guess. Things would be ten times better if you were here." He was so sweet sometimes. 

"You liar. I have three brats. What's better about being burdened with three screaming furry children?" 

Koujaku laughed. "When I think about living with you, I figure we could just leave your kids at those two asshole's place." 

Aoba laughed with him. "I wish." He stopped laughing when he realized what a terrible person he was. 

"What's wrong?" 

"Oh, no. I just remembered that leaving isn't really an option." 

"Sure it is! I'm being absolutely serious when I say that we should live together without your satanic children!" Koujaku insisted. 

(Audience laughter)

"Haha. Satanic. But I can't, you know? Trip and Virus are yakuza. I've tried to get away at least a dozen times, but they always find me in a heart beat."

"We can leave the country."

"Get real."

"No! I'm absolutely serious! We should go!" 

Aoba felt his chest tighten. Koujaku really did love him. He was even willing to give up his entire life, everything he had worked for, for him. He took a deep breath, and choked out. "I love you, but you know I can't."

There was a long, awkward pause before Koujaku asked. "Are you at least able to sneak out tonight?" 

Aoba figured that Koujaku was worth the risk. "Yeah. Where do you want to go?" 

"Well, I've already got a surprise planned for you. I'll be waiting outside of your house tonight, at one a.m. Sound good?"

"Yeah!" Aoba was brimming with excitement. He hadn't had much to look forward to but brief phone calls from his secret lover for a while, but now he was going to actually spend time with him for the first time in two long months? He felt like he could squeal. But he didn't, because he's too macho for that shit. "I love you." He whispered into the receiver. 

"Love you, too. See you tonight!"

\---

Aoba listened for Virus's steady breathing, making sure that he was for sure asleep. When he was positive, he slowly slid out of bed, making sure not to make any noises. He pulled on some pants and a shirt, wincing quite a lot during the pants part, still sore from what Trip had done to him the other night, and from what Virus made him do just now. 

He crept down the stairs, his footsteps muffled by that ugly eighties carpet, and slipped out the front door, hoping nobody heard him leave. 

He spotted Koujaku waving at him from his car, and smiled widely. He rushed over to the vehicle, and hopped into the passenger's seat. Koujaku gave him a quick kiss on the lips, and sped away. 

"You're going to love where I'm about to take you, it's really wonderful there." Koujaku smiled and looked over at his lover. "Oh my god, Aoba you look amazing!"

"Thanks! I just crawled out of bed after being raped by a mentally ill yakuza." Aoba sighed, trying to make a really, really bad joke. 

(Audience laughter)

Koujaku looked at him, concerned. "I'm so sorry you're going through this, Aoba. I wish you would let me help you get out of this." 

"No. I'm sorry. I'm ruining the mood. I'm really happy to see you again." Aoba kissed him on the cheek. 

After a few more minutes of driving and making meaningless small talk, they finally reached their destination. Koujaku drove up to the side of a lake, where the moon illuminated the water, and made it sparkle like it was composed of a thousand tiny crystals. 

"Pretty." Aoba commented. 

Koujaku looked disappointed. "I thought you would be more impressed."

"I'm impressed!" Aoba cried maybe a little too forcefully. He lowered his voice. "It's perfect."

Koujaku smiled and kissed Aoba softly. Aoba kissed back with much more force, and soon enough they were making out in Koujaku's car like a couple of teenagers. Koujaku shoved his tongue inside of Aoba's warm, wet mouth, and started licking everything. Aoba let a pleasurable moan, and tangled his fingers into Koujaku's fabulous hair. 

Koujaku pulled away, panting. "There's more room in the back seat." 

"Yeah, okay." Aoba grabbed his head and continued kissing him roughly. 

Koujaku grabbed him by the thighs and slung him into the back seat. Aoba laughed at the feeling of being picked up and gently tossed. Koujaku squirmed into the backseat as well, and straddled Aoba. Koujaku kissed all over Aoba's face like a puppy, and left a trail of kisses leading down to his collar bone. Aoba gasped and grabbed at Koujaku's clothes, pulling the two closer. "Are you all right Koujaku? Your nose is bleeding a little." Aoba asked, concerned. Koujaku looked down, and noticed that Aoba's face and neck were spattered with his nose blood. His face turned red. "Oh, sorry about that." He tried to wipe the blood off of his face, but only ended up smearing it along his cheek. Aoba laughed at his dorky boyfriend. "I love you," He whispered. 

There was a loud thump on the window, and light flooded the car. "Hey! What are you crazy kids doing out so late?" 

Aoba looked up in shock and screamed when he saw Trip and Virus standing at the window. Instinctively, Koujaku covered Aoba protectively with his body, and shouted. "If you touch him I'll kill you!" 

Trip gasped in mock horror. "You'll kill us? Oh no! Virus, we should get out of here fast!" He chuckled at the hairdresser's foolishness. 

Virus smirked. "Yeah, I'm pretty sure the only people who're going to do any killing are us." He gestured for some dead-eyed gang members who had accompanied them to come forward. 

"Shit." Aoba whispered under his breath. He could feel his heart thumping frantically. He knew this wasn't going to end well at all. 

\---

"You know Aoba-San, you really hurt our feelings. We really do love you. Why won't you just love us back?" Virus asked a distraught Aoba. 

"Because you're fucking sick!" Aoba spat at him. 

(Audience laughter)

Virus smiled and stooped down to where Aoba was sitting on the floor, chained to the bed, and held that pretty little head in his hands. "We've never been able to stomp out your fire, have we? It'll be a fun project for Trip and I to do over the next few weeks." 

Aoba jerked his face from Virus's hands and scowled. 

Virus rolled his eyes. "Are you pouty about the fact that your little boyfriend is in the hospital for that 'car accident?'" 

"I hate you."

(Audience laughter) 

Virus grabbed Aoba's hair roughly, so that the blue haired twink cried out in pain. "You love me." He insisted. Virus heard rustling sounds coming from the closet behind him. "What's that?"

Virus opened the closet door, and a gagged and bound Noiz tumbled out. "What the hell? Are you the pizza guy?" He removed the gag from the delivery man's mouth. 

"Those lion children need to be kink shamed." Noiz spat. "Also, I took a shit on your floor." 

(Audience laughter)

"Aw crap." Virus sighed. "How long have you been in there?" 

"That depends. What day is it?" 

Virus started untying the German pizza guy. "You will tell no one. Got it? If you do, I will find you, and you will end up like Aoba over there, because damn you're hot." He gestured to the tied up Aoba. 

Noiz looked over to the man being pointed at. "Hey. I like your dick. It's a cool color."

"What the fuck?" Aoba tried to position his legs so that the socially awkward male couldn't see it, but failed miserably because he was fucking tied to the bed. 

"Care to join us?" Virus asked in a low, creepy voice, sort of sounding like a rapist. 

"Hell no. I have so much pizza to eat, and if I leave Usagimodoki alone for too long, he'll eat my neighbor's cat." The strange man left the two alone, and Aoba was sad to see him go, mainly because if he stayed, Virus might be molesting someone other than him for a while. 

Virus looked over at Aoba mercifully. "You know, I can't stay mad at you for very long, Aoba. You're just too charming. Do you want to hug it out and break open a bottle of wine?"

(Audience laughter)

Aoba figured he should give up now. Accept the facts. His life was always going to be like this. There was no chance of anything changing. "O-okay, Virus-San."

"That's a good boy." Virus gave him a trademark Full House hug, and kissed him on the forehead. "I'm glad you've come to your senses."

**Author's Note:**

> I'm so sorry, everyone. So, so sorry. This was just too good of an idea, it would be a crime to let it go to waste.


End file.
